I Can Smile Today

It is so interesting to me how quickly my downs can shift and all of a sudden everything feels right again. Today that happened for me. It is usually no doing on my part that I can see, but all of a sudden I have energy, motivation, and the ability to handle the everyday simple tasks that just moments ago had seemed insurmountable to me. For a few days I hadn't even been able to leave the house. I felt so sad, so tired, and so hopeless again. For me the outside world doesn't even exist until I am well again. When I get like this Bailey will give me a hug and ask, "What's wrong?" All I can say is that I am having a hard day. She has lived her whole eleven years with me struggling with my depression, mood swings, and energy shifts. She doesn't know any different. I can see that she has become a very independent girl which can be a good trait in her in life, but I feel sad that she hasn't had a "normal" childhood like my other kids did before I got so sick. If anything good can come from this I hope that my kids have developed an understanding and empathy for others. Everyone has their trials and challenges in life. This is one of ours. Today I am thankful that I can enjoy the holiday with my family.